THE LOVELY CRAZY
When your sister drops off 50 lbs of beets, on top of the 50 lbs that you have to harvest that are growing in your garden, what do you do?
Well chips of course.
Yeah, chips. That%u2019s right. When I got home from camping on Monday and there was a humongous pile of beets sitting next to my front door, I am not going to lie, I was a little shocked. I mean there wasn’t just a few little ones. These beets were freaking huge, like the size of my arm, and so many. But pretty much right after my initial shock I knew what needed to be done. First, eat a few roasted, second, roast extra to freeze for later, and lastly, make a few bunches of chips.
Have you ever had beet chip? They are amazing. Crispy, crunchy, tasty as all heck. If you like beets, even in the slightest, you will love these. If you hate beets, well maybe don%u2019t? Either way, beet chips are the best chip. Wha’t%u2019s not to love? Pink, and chippy. Sweet, and salty. And then you add the fact that making beets into chips is a good way to get your veggies in and that you can eat a whole bowl full and feel zero guilt because you are just eating beets. Plus making beets into chips is a good way to use up any extra beets you might have laying around or that have been dropped off at your front door.
These chips, once they are made, will not last long. So when you do make them, know you will probably be making them again soon there after. Me, I have still have to harvest all my garden beets so beet chips are happening again soon. Real soon (like this afternoon!)
To the beets!
The stuff. Beets (these are Formanova beets but any variety works) salt and pepper ,and oil.
Ok so you need to cut these bad boys reallllllly thin. Like 1/15th a inch. So, what I am saying is, use a mandolin. If you don%u2019t have one, a knife will do, but you are going to have a hard time getting them as thin as you need to and all of them consistent so baking is going to be a little more tricky so maybe you should just go borrow or invest in a mandolin.
Grab baking sheets, oil, and salt and pepper. You can either dump the oil directly onto the pile of sliced beets and really toss to make sure each one has been coasted or do what I did which was I drizzled oil into my hands and rubbed each sliced beet between my oiled hands before placing on the sheet.
After you get them on there, single layered with no overlapping, sprinkle tops with a pinch of salt and pepper.
On the way into the oven.
After the oven. Baked for about 18 minutes. You really have to watch after the first 13 or so minutes to make sure you catch them at the perfect time. Crispy, but not burnt.
A side by side shot. Crazy shrinking will happen!
Oh man, so delicious. And so pretty!.
Let the chips cool before eating, you know, so you don%u2019t burn your tongue. Plus they crisp up a wee bit more.
Once cooled, pile them into bowl, and then eat them. And eat them all. They are only beets after all. And you won%u2019t be able to stop yourself anyway. Ha
-C
Makes enough for an evening of chip eating for 1-2 people
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2 Large beets (think softball sized)
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a tablespoon or two of oil (I used grape seed but really any would work)
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salt and pepper
Note. Making these without cutting with a mandolin will be a pain in the ass. It can be done, but if you have a mandolin, use it.
Preheat oven to 350
With a mandolin, slice the beets about 1/15 inch thick. (No need to peel the beets unless you want to.) Once beets are all sliced, either drizzle them all with a tablespoon or so of oil and toss until all are coated. OR what I did and found worked really well was drizzled oil into my hands and rubbed each beet between my oiled hands as I was placing them on the baking sheets. Either way.
Now place oiled beets, single layered, without overlapping, on baking sheets. Sprinkle with a pinch of salt and pepper and place into oven. Bake for about 13 minutes without worrying then start to check every minute or so until the beets are a deep golden brown and crispy ,which will be between 15-20 minutes. Also, even though you cut them all the exact same thickness, some might crisp up faster so you should remove done chips as they happen. Once they are done, place on a rack to cool. And then do another batch. And not, they do crisp up a tiny bit more as they cool.
Once chips are cool and crisp, eat.
Store uneaten (how did you not eat them all?) chips in an air tight container. If you notice that they turned a bit chew, just place them back into oven while preheating oven to 300 then turn oven off and let sit in there for a few minutes.
We have officially kicked off our summer camping adventures. And with camping comes all the greatness of all the things, including camping food.
Recently a friend asked me what it is that we do for camp food. So I told her. Camp food is basically aways the same and consists of a big pot of spiced warm lentils or split peas (both cook really fast and have lots of protein), a shredded summer squash in the summer, or pumpkin in the colder months, maybe fresh tomatoes or a bunch of kale to chop and mix in, and a side of cut up carrots, cucumbers, green beens or whatever else I have.. Then I’ll bring a hunk of bread for the mr to eat and me, usually a small head of cabbage to squirt mustard on and crunch into. (Always have the mustard on hand.) And I bring apples to snack on too, but that usually it. (Sometime I%u2019ll back a desert for the mr. If I am feeling nice.)
She was a little taken aback. Said when she (and basically everyone in the world, which I disagreed with) goes camping it is bags of chips, cookies, meat, and everything and anything that she (they) wanted. Basically that camp food was junk food and that she though we were weirdos. But cool weirdos so you know.
So our camp food%u2026 not like many others. But honestly it is everything that I want to eat and I love it so whatever whatever. As for the mr, he is happy with the food and when he is not, he brings along something else, but that rarely happens because my lentils be so good. HA!
But she got me thinking that I should have a few more snack options beside cut up carrots and apples. So that is why I made crackers. These chickpea chili lime, freaking amazing crackers. Because crackers are a very appropriate snack food, and these crackers in particular are even greater because they are made with the goodness of chickpea flour which is packed full of protein and is well received after a day of hiking or other fun outdoor camping activities. And how can you go wrong with chili lime? Well i%u2019ll tell you, you really can%u2019t
So the plan was to make a batch, eat a few, save the rest for this camping weekend. But guess what? I have to make another batch. They didn%u2019t make it. We ate them all. (not sorry) At least I know we will be liking our new camping snack addition well and right.
So if you like crackers, camping or elsewhere, you should really gives these a go. They will not disappoint.
Now to the crackers!
The stuff. Chickpea flour, chili powder, a lime, a little baking powder, olive oil, salt and pepper, and water.
Combine the flour, zest of the lime, half the chili powder and half the salt, and the baking powder and some pepper in a bowl. Mix until completely combined then add in the oil, water and the juice of the lime.
Mix until dough forms. It might feel a little sticky, if that is the case, just mix other tablespoon of chickpea flour.
Knead dough on a well chickpea floured surface for a good minute until the dough is a even consistency then let it sit for a few minutes to rest. Once rested, cut dough into 2-3 pieces because working smaller is easier.
Roll out your first piece of dough about 1/8 inch thick. (Again, make sure to really flour your work surface and rolling pin.) Mix salt and chili powder together and sprinkle on top. Cut out your crackers (squares are nice but triangles would be nice too) then poke each cracker with a fork.
Crackers on a baking sheet before baking and after baking looking all crackery and delicious. And yeah, they shrink a bit.
And lastly, cool the crackers on a cooling rack. They will crisp up a even more. Then it%u2019s all you.
Ready to eat whenever you make the move. You can pack them away for later or place these delicious crackers in a very pretty bowl and eat them away. Or both.
A cracker win!
-C
make 75 crackers
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1 1/2 cups chick pea flour plus about 1/3 more for dusting and rolling
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1/2 teaspoon baking powder
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1 tablespoon olive oil
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1/3 cup room temp water
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1 teaspoon chili powder split in half
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1 lime
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1 teaspoon salt split in half
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1/2 teaspoon fresh crackers pepper
Preheat oven to 350.
In a bowl combine the chick pea flour, baking soda, pepper, 1/2 teaspoon chili powder, and half a 1/2 teaspoon salt. Mix until evenly incorporated. Add in oil, the juice of the lime, and and water and mix until a dough forms. Dump dough onto counter and knead until completely uniform in texture. Add more flour if the dough is really sticky. Set dough aside for a few minutes to rest.
To make the crackers, really dust the counter with chickpea flour. Cut the dough into 2-3 pieces and roll1 piece out at a time to about an1/8 inch thin. Again, really flour the surface and rolling pin or else the dough will stick Once rolled, combine the remaining chili powder and salt and sprinkle the top with it. And then cut the crackers. Take a knife of bench scrapper or pizza cattier and cut the dough into inch long strips vertically, then diagonally. Poke each cracker with a fork then gently place them onto a baking sheet. Repeat with remaining dough.
Bake crackers for 15-20 minutes or until a nice deep golden brown. Remove from oven and let cool on a wire rack.
And then eat.
Store uneaten crackers in an airtight container for about a week.
What with all the holiday and family get togethers we have had over here at my house the past few week, we have had quite a few bags of chips and pretzels left over. Always almost empty%u2026 Always dumped into the compost because I mean, I am not so keen on seeing bags of little bits of chips and pretzels in the pantry that I know will never get eaten. Plus it is not like I am saving carrots or grapes or anything I would eat, it%u2019s junk food. But still. I hate the food waste. That is why I made these cookies. To not waste food. And because we had people coming over to the house for dinner and I cannot not have something for dessert. That would be just wrong. And lastly because I am pretty sure that chips and pretzel pieces only make a plain chocolate chunk cookie into an amazing sweet and salty cookie that will just blow your mind.
And I was right. I made the cookies, I feed them to the mr, the sister, friends and all the littles and they just couldn%u2019t get enough.
Current thought. I am sitting here typing and have come to the conclusion that I should start a bakery that makes cookies out of people almost empty bags of chips, like a Cheeto dust cookie, or a peanut butter Funyun cookie or chocolate chocolate chip Dorito cookie.
Yes. this is a good idea. Oh man, I am a genius.
But back to theeese cookies. Start with these. I%u2019ll let you know when I open the storefront to Garbage Cookies (that is what I’ll call the place) You can stand in line for the peanut butter Funyun cookies. I have a feeling about that flavor. Until then%u2026
To the cookies!
The stuff. The small bowl has flour, baking powder and baking soda. The big bowl has brown and white sugar. Then you need oil, almond milk, vanilla, chocolate chunks, some pretzels and some plain salted potatoes chips.
Start with the wet. Mix the oil, the milk, and the vanilla into the sugars until completely smooth
Whisk together the dry stuff.
And mix until its a cookie dough. Now here is the thing, you need to stick the dough in the fridge for a couple hours and if you mix in the chips and pretzels now, well I think that might make them extrealemy soggy, so hold off. For now, cover dough and refrigerate for 2-4 hours.
When the time comes for baking, grab the mix ins and with whatever method you chose, crush the chips and pretzels into small bits. (avoid turning into a dust, you want bits)
All salty and crumbly and ready to go
Grab the dough from fridge and dump in the stuff that needs to go in (crushed chips and pretzels and chocolate chunks).
Scoop dough into balls and place on a baking sheet.
Into the oven and out they come all golden brown and smelling like yes and mmmmmm.
Get those cookies on a wire rack to cool and to free up the baking sheet to keep baking.
Look at this proud cookie. Chips, pretzels, and chocolate chunks all on display.
Now is when you get yourself a plate, pile it up high, and eat.
Remember, sharing is caring so maybe share a cookie or two. (but like you don%u2019t HAVE to)
Stay happy this weekend.
-C
makes about 2 dozen cookies
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2 cup all purpose flour
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1 teaspoon baking soda
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1/2 teaspoon baking powder
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1/2 cup packed brown sugar
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1/2 cup white sugar
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1/2 cup canola oil
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1 teaspoon vanilla
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6 tablespoons plant milk
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1/2 cup crushed potato chip
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1/2 cup crushed pretzels pieces
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3/4 cup chocolate chunks or chips
In a large bowl, mix together the sugars, oil, milk, and vanilla until completely combined. In a separate bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder and soda. Dump the dry into the wet and mix until the dough comes together. Gather the dough together in the bowl and cover with plastic and stick in the fridge to rest for at least 2 hour and up to a day.
When ready to bake, preheat oven to 350
Right before you take the dough from fridge, get your chocolate chunks, pretzels, and chips out. If the chips and pretzels are not already in little bits, place them in a bag (just use the chip bag if you have it) and smash with a heavy object until you turn the chips and pretzels into bits. Be carful that you don%u2019t turn it all into a dust, look for small bits. Pull dough from fridge and mix the stuff in. Scoop out balls of dough and place on baking sheets. Bake cookies in oven for 11-12 minutes or until lightly browed. Remove from oven and immediately transfer cookies to a wire rack to cool.
And now you eat.
Store uneaten cookie in a airtight container for up to a week or freeze them but I doubt you will have too. The cookies went fast.
It happens every year. SO MANY TOMATOES! This is not a complaint, just a fun fact. And so for the forseeable future, besides canning and freezing tomatoes at a rapid pace, I will also be sticking them into everything. Enter here a tomato cracker. But who wants just a tomato cracker? I( bet some would love just a tomato cracker) But a tomato basil cracker, well that is something people will want. And yes, I have a buttload of basil at he moment too.. I cook with what I got!
Tomato basil crackers. First off, I needed to make a road snack for the mr and cut up chunks of raw tomatoes would not have gone down well with him, so I figured what better way to use up some tomatoes then a cracker situation because why the hell not.%u00a0%u00a0I was a little hesitant to use fresh tomatoes and not cook them or roast the in anyway before using them in the crackers, but I glad I didn’t. The tomato flavor really shines through, pairs beautifully with the basil,%u00a0and you get to skip having to deal with cooking down the tomatoes, which makes them all the more easy to make.
So I made the crackers and gave a baggie to the mr to eat, which he did right then and there (with some sweet ass baba ganoush because yes)%u00a0then packed a big bag for the road trip.%u00a0Not only was the mr chowing down, but my sisters were gobbling them up too, even the one who is gluten free. %u00a0That is good cracker validation.%u00a0
If you have never made your own crackers and you are a cracker person, now is the time to start doing it. I don’t eat crackers personally, but the mr and every one around me really seem to be cracker people so a while back I started to make them at home, and once you make a homemade cracker, the store bought ones will just not be acceptable anymore. But they really are super easy so you really should be making them at home anyway.. No pressure though.
The stuff. Flour, olive oil, tomatoes, fresh basil, and sea salt.%u00a0
Chunks of fresh tomato go into blender and get blended up all nice and smooth. Add in basil and oil and pulse until basil turns to little specks.
Pour the blended mixture into the flour.
Mix with a spoon until you can’t mix anymore then dump onto the counter.
Keeping the counter nice and floured, knead dough for a minute until it all comes together into nice ball.
Working with half of the dough at a time, roll out one of the pieces %u00a0about 1/4-1/8 inch thick.%u00a0%u00a0(really flour counter and rolling pin)%u00a0
And cut into crackers.. Shapes are up to you, but inch to 2 inch squares are easies to cut.%u00a0
Place crackers onto backing sheet. Before oven time and after oven time.%u00a0%u00a0They shrink and puff up a little bit in the oven. That is what a cracker is suppose to do. (but if you don’t like that you can prevent it by piercing the crackers with a fork before they go into the oven)%u00a0
And that’s it. Simple, and delicious.%u00a0
Crackers are looking all pretty like I am about to have party or something. I even made baba ganoush to serve with them. Lucky mr, he got to have this cracker party all to himself. Ha (He did not eat all of these crackers at once, that would be crazy)%u00a0
-C
makes between 100 -125 crackers%u00a0
- 3 cups flour
- 2 large tomatoes %u00a0( equal to 1 1/4 cup of tomato puree )
- 1/3 cup fresh basil leaves%u00a0
- 4 tablespoons olive oil%u00a0
- About 2 tablespoons sea salt%u00a0
Remove core from tomatoes and place into food processor or blender. Blend until smooth and measure out 1 1/4 cups of the puree. Any left overs rs can be used as food later on. Dump measured puree back into blender and add in the basil and oil and pulse until the basil is in little pieces but not completely blended in. %u00a0Add flour to a big bowl then pour in tomato mixture and mix until a dough forms. Dump out onto counter and knead for a minute or two until dough is uniform in texture.%u00a0
Preheat oven to 400 degrees
On a floured surface, divide dough in half as to make rolling it easier, and roll dough into a rectangle that is 1/4- 1/8 inch thick. It is important to make sure the rolling pin and counter are well floured to avoid the dough from sticking. Once rolled out, sprinkle with sea salt and lightly roll the dough once more to kind of press the salt in then cut with either pizza cutter or a cracker cutter, or a knife, into 1 1/2 inch squares. The edges are going to be wonky shaped and you can either except them as they are or re roll and recut. (Note. IF you want your crackers to late flat and not puff up while baking, stab the crackers with a fork before they go into oven to create air vents. But honestly, most people really like the puffed up cracker)%u00a0%u00a0Place cut crackers onto a baking sheet and stick into oven. Bake for 15 minutes, checking after 10, until the crackers are golden brown. %u00a0Don’t forget to roll and bake off the other half of the dough!
Once crackers look good, remove from oven and place onto cooling rack. They will get crisper as they cool.%u00a0
Eat as many as you want. Store extra crackers in a airtight container or bag.%u00a0
I have fond memories of young me skipping school and sitting in front of the tv with peanut butter,%u00a0a package of graham crackers, and a glass of milk to dunk the peanut butter cover crackers in,%u00a0watching myself some Martha Stewart. I also have some fond memories of the days in college I would skip class (obviously to finish a paper or something), and sit around eating graham crackers covered in peanut butter and nutella,%u00a0dipped in beer? Wait no, it was coffee.%u00a0(although….beer? Could be something there.)%u00a0%u00a0Apparently I liked to skip class and eat peanut butter graham crackers. But don’t blame the cracker for the bad behavior, blame the eater. And I didn’t do it all the time, only once in a while. (A girl needed to watch her some Martha or write a 20 page paper.)%u00a0
We had a BBQ this week and for some reason I though people want to eat s’mores at a BBQ. (I guess I got that confused with camping.) %u00a0I figured even though the days of skipping life and eating graham crackers has passed me by, that I needed to make the graham crackers for others to enjoy. And then I wondered why the heck no one ever makes graham crackers. They are by far the underrated crispy cookie (lets just call it what it is ) of the snack world.%u00a0%u00a0I think I might make it my new thing. I’ll make graham crackers for ever cookie swap situation, every event that requires a dessert, every time a snack is need,%u00a0until people realize what they are missing. I’ll bring the graham cracker into all it’s glory.%u00a0
These graham crackers were raved over by people who like graham crackers and were absolutely perfect for s’mores.%u00a0%u00a0A few of the littles that don’t like graham crackers did not care for them, but I guess you can’t make everyone happy. Tthey just wanted to eat the marshmallows.)%u00a0They are crispy and crackery, tiny bit smokey and sweet but not to sweet, and perfect for all your graham cracker needs.
The stuff. In one bowl there is graham flour, all purpose flour, baking soda and salt. The other bowl has brown sugar, honey and molasses. Also going to need vegan butter, vanilla, and a little bit of plant milk.%u00a0
The big bowl of sweet stuff get beaten together with the butter and vanilla until smooth, then the dry mixture and milk go in an beaten until just combined.%u00a0
. This is what graham cracker dough looks like.%u00a0Course %u00a0and chunky,%u00a0but done. Don’t beat it anymore, just use your hands to gather it tighter.%u00a0
Gather the dough into a ball then wrap %u00a0in plastic (or stick in a plastic bag)and smoosh flat and rectangular. Place in the fridge for at least 2 hours, if not overnight. IT needs the time firm up.%u00a0
After the dough has firmed up, its time to roll it out. Cut the dough in half (place the other half back in fridge until you are ready for it) and roll out on a very floured surface. The dough is sticky and %u00a0not super strong so go slow and make sure to keep the surface and the rolling pin floured so it doesn’t stick .
When it’s all rolled out, trim the sides even the cut %u00a0into into squares or rectangular (or any shape you want). I was going to measure and make them all the same size and then I was like, yeah, no. I just eyed it and made them kind of the same size. I don’t live in a world where I need perfect graham crackers.%u00a0
Gently transfer the crackers (%u00a0I used the bench scrapper to list them, but a spatula would be good too) on a parchment lined baking sheet. Run a %u00a0line the doesn’t cut all the way through in the middle of each cracker and then poke 6 (or how many you want) hole on each side. You can use a toothpick or a wooden skewer. I used a size 8 kitting needle.
Get all your crackers made and sprinkle the tops with a little graduated sugar. Pop into the preheated oven to bake for 15-20 minutes,%u00a0rotated around 10 to keep an even bake.%u00a0
Done. Golden brown graham cracker success.%u00a0
Cool the crackers on a wire rack.
And now you have yourself graham crackers for all your graham cracker needs.%u00a0
May I suggest a smear of peanut butter, maybe a glass of milk or coffee and some Martha Stewart on the tv?%u00a0
-C
Makes between 20-30 crackers depending on size
- 1 1/2 cups graham flour (unbolted whole wheat flour with the germ and bran)
- 1 1/4 cup all purpose flour%u00a0
- 1 teaspoon salt%u00a0
- 1 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/2 cup light brown sugar
- 1/4 cup honey (can sub %u00a0in golden syrup or brown rice syrup)
- 2 tablespoons molasses (not black strap)
- 1/2 cup vegan butter%u00a0
- 1 teaspoon vanilla%u00a0
- 1 tablespoon plant milk%u00a0
- 1 tablespoon white sugar
Stick the butter, brown sugar, honey, molasses , and vanilla %u00a0into a large bowl and beat with an electric beater until smooth, In a smaller bowl, whisk together the flours, salt, and baking soda. Dump the dry into the wet, add in the milk and beat on low until mixture just starts to come together,then use your hand and smoosh and knead the dough into a ball. Either wrap or place dough ball %u00a0in a plastic airtight bag, smoosh into a flat rectangular shape, and refrigerate for at least 2 hours, if not over night.
When you are ready to bake the crackers, preheat oven to 325 and line 2 large baking sheets with parchment paper.%u00a0
Cut dough in half and place one half back in fridge while working with the other half. Flour a surface and the rolling pin and roll dough our into a retangle about 1/8 inch thick. Trim sides ( a pizza cutter or dough scraper works really well here)%u00a0to make a sides straight (straight enough) and then cut into equal sizes pieces that are the size of your liking. (What it did was cut in half, then each half into thirds %u00a0vertically %u00a0then the whole thing in thirds hortiztally. I ended up with 18 pieces) %u00a0
Place the crackers on prepared baking sheet and take you cutting instruments and run a line along the middle of each cracker without cutting all the way through (if you cut all the way through, it should fuse back together in baking) Take a wooden skewer %u00a0and poke 6 holes into each side. Sprinkle with white sugar. Now grab the second half of the dough and do the same thing. And don’t forget to gather all the trimming and either roll into more crackers or just make one weird shaped blob cracker for taste testing.
Once all the crackers are prepared, stick into the oven to bake for 15- 20 minutes (15 for a softer cracker, 20 for a more crispy cracker)%u00a0, rotating after 10 minutes to insure even baking. Once the crackers are a nice %u00a0golden brown, remove and place on a wire rack to cool.
Eat the way you do.%u00a0
Store uneaten crackers in a airtight container for a up to a week.%u00a0Crackers can be frozen for later use.%u00a0
The mr has a soft spot for tortilla chips. He doesn’t get chips often, but when he does it is usually the super fried, super salty, in a plastic bag, tortilla chips. And I am ok with that because it is not often and the dude deserves chips when he wants them. But I hate how crappy they are for him, especially all the salt. So much salt that I can smell it in my mouth (yes, I said that right). So, as with everything else we eat in the house, I now make chips from scratch. (Slowly I have eliminated just about everything that is pre packaged and started making it myself.%u00a0I think it’s pretty much just the dried pasta and the mr’s yogurt and cheese that I haven’t gotten to.Yet.) This way he can eat his chips and I don’t have to sit there tasting the smell and thinking about the crap that he is eating.%u00a0%u00a0I know I say this a lot, but lets just take a minute here and acknowledge how I really am the best girlfriend ever.%u00a0
Ok, now about these chips. I have made plan tortilla chips a few times before and figured it was time for a twist.%u00a0%u00a0In come black beans. Why, because I was pretty sure beans were going to be awesome, and lo and behold, I was completely right. Adding the beans take little to no more effort then making the chips without, and bonus here, more fiber and protein and good stuff going into a chip. Then they are lightly oil, lightly salted, and eaten without any guilt because I made them and they are the best. Seriously, the mr thinks they are amazing and doesn’t miss those pre package ones a bit.%u00a0%u00a0And sure, they might take a little time and minimal effort, but really they are super easy and the time and effort to make them is probably no more then going into a store, waiting in line to pay, and driving home to eat your chips. You can have these chip made in that amount of time. So you might as well just make them.
To the chips.%u00a0
The stuff. Masa harnia, black beans, water, salt, and a little oil. There should be a lemon or lime here too, but I forgot to stick it into the picture. Oops.%u00a0
Pretty easy.%u00a0%u00a0Add the beans to a food processor and blend untill completely smooth. Add in the masa and pulse then gradually add in water until a dough forms. Stop and feel the dough. If it feels like play dough and comes together into ball easily, then you are good. If it is to wet, add a little more masa, to dry, more water.
Dump the dough onto the counter and form into a ball. Place the doguh into a bowl and cover with a damp closer for 15-30 minutes to let the dough rest.
After the rest, divide the dough into 12 pieces and roll into balls. Place the balls onto a damp cloth and cover while you are making the tortillas so they don’t dry out.%u00a0
To flatten those balls into tortillas.%u00a0%u00a0After doing this a bunch of times, I have a system that works the best for me.%u00a0%u00a0I use a large ziplock bag (the plastic is a little thicker and easier to deal with, plus I don’t use plastic wrap), a cutting board, and a rolling pin. Place a dough ball into the center of the bag then take the cutting board and press directly on top, placing all your weight onto it. It gets flat, but not flat enough so take the rolling pin and flatten some more. Then press the rolled out dough with the cutting board one last time. Carefuly remove from bag and place direrely onto a hot dry skillet.%u00a0
Cook each side 3-4 minutes or until it starts to get a few light brown spots. Once cooked, place on a plate or baking sheet. If I were just making tortillas, I would place then in between a kitchen towel to keep them warm, but because they are destined for chips and don’t care.%u00a0
Black bean corn tortillas.%u00a0Hey, you could stop here and make a taco or something if you need to. Feel free to use a tortilla or two before using the rest to make the into chips.%u00a0
So chips. Grab baking sheets, oil, salt, a knife, and the tortillas. Take a few of the tortillas and oil them. (The easiest way I found to do this is to rub oil on with my hands then rub the oil onto the tortillas.%u00a0)%u00a0Oil 3 at a time, stacked them on top of each other and cut into 8 triangles,%u00a0
Get as many of the triangles onto a baking sheet as you can, without overlapping. %u00a0Once all nice and tight, sprinkle the tops with salt and pop them into preheated oven.%u00a0
Pull the chips out of the oven when they are crispy and done (about 10 minutes)%u00a0then squeeze a little lemon juice all over the chips. Toss around and pop the pan back into the oven for another minute or two just so the juice doesn’t %u00a0leave the chips soggy.
Dump cooked chips %u00a0onto a wire rack to cool. Eat as you work, you deserve it.
Pile chips into a bowl, and serve with some salsa or guacamole or whatever you eat you chips with. %u00a0They are your chips.%u00a0
-C
Makes 98 chips, or like a good sized bag worth
- 2 cups masa harina%u00a0
- 1 cup cooked black beans in bean juice
- 1- 1 1/4%u00a0 cups warm water
- couple teaspoons neutral oil (I used grape seed oil)
- 2-3 teaspoons salt
- A lemon or lime
Beans go into a food processor and blended until completely smooth. Add in the masa and blend, slowly adding 3/4 cups water until a dough starts to forms. %u00a0Stop and check dough. It should feel like play dough and come together easilty onto a ball. If it feel wet, add in a couple of tablespoons more of the masa. If it is still too dry and crumbly, add in more water until it’s to the right consistnacey. Dump dough onto counter and form in a ball. Place dough in a bowl and cover with a damp towel and let sit for abut 15-30 minutes.
Preheat a skillet on medium high heat on stove.
Once dough has rested, divide into 12 pieces and roll into balls. Place balls onto a damp towel and cover when not working with them.%u00a0Grab a large ziplock bag, a cutting board, and a rolling pin. Take a dough ball and place in the center of the bag. Press down with the cutting board, placing all your weight on top. It got flat, but not flat enough. Continue to flatten out with the rolling pin until it is about %u00a01/8 inch thick. Press again one last time with the cutting board. Gently remove from bag and place directly onto the hot skillet. Cook each side for 3-4 minutes or until it %u00a0starts to get a few light brown spot. Place cooked tortilla on a baking sheet or in between a kitchen towel. Repeat until all 12 dough balls are cooked into tortillas.
Preheat oven to 375
Working in 3’s. dump a little oil onto your hand then lightly rub it all over the tortillas. Stack them on top of each other then cut into 8 wedged. Place wedges onto a baking sheet, get as many as you can onto sheet without any overlapping, then sprinkle with salt. to taste. If you have them, use multiple baking sheets.%u00a0%u00a0Place in oven for about 10-12 minutes or until the chips are crispy. Remove and sprinkle lemon juice all over the chips. Toss around and place back into oven for a minute or two just until lth lemon juice evaporates. Remove and dump chips onto a wire rack to cool.
Eat chips. Any left over can be placed into a airtight container or bag and will last about 3-4 days.%u00a0

When something goes on sale at the grocery store, I tend to buy it. Being that it is Valentines Day this week, all the stores are having specials on all sorts of sexy things… and strawberries are one of them. Now I am not a huge fan of buying produce that is terribly out of season, but I can’t help myself…a good deal is a good deal and the strawberries were a super good deal. I was just going to make some sweet ass strawberry jam or maybe a lovely strawberry cake with them (and I probably still will), but these strawberries are actually super juicy and full of flavor, and it’s always nice to eat some full flavor freshy strawberries… especially soaked in balsamic vinegar. And yeah, I think that this salad is pretty sexy, so it makes for a perfect Valentines day dish.
A handful of ingredients and 5 minutes will get you to a fantastic salad experience.
Pour the vinegar on the strawberries and let sit for at least 5 minutes. (the longer the strawberries can sit with the vinegar, the better)
Pile it on.. thinly slice avocado.. rough chopped toasted almonds… It’s pretty much as easy as it can get.
And last but not least, toss on the balsamic soaked strawberries and drizzle the remaining vinegar. (if you made hearts, place on top to make pretty) Sprinkle with a pitch of salt and pepper and pow! Fancy, sexy, delicious salad.
Before we left for the weekend, I was was trying my hardest to empty the fridge out of all food with the intention of leaning it empty so I could leave it open to defrost while were were gone. Unfortunately I was not able to make it happen. What I did make happen was emptying it almost completely so that when we got home, we had pretty much no food in the house, except for a few things that probably should be eaten. Plus one of the last things that I want to do after sitting in a car for 6 hours is go to the grocery store, or anywhere for that matter, so I was determined to make with what wet had in the fridge:
The stuff… A huge hunk of a bigger then my head kohlrabi (or 2 normal bulbs). A carrot, an apple, toasted walnuts, red wine vinegar, and some salt.
Sprinkle with salt and a good glug glug of red wine vinegar. Chop up the walnuts (some big chunks and some very small pieces makes for good eating), toss it all together and, well that’s it. But wait…. let it sit for a few minutes before serving to really let the flavors draw out.
And there we have it. Super fast, full of flavors and crunchy texture. A salad slaw after my own heart.





%u00a0 %u00a0%u00a0
%u00a0I figured now is a good time to get this recipe out there before we get to far into spring and summer recipes because there is going to be a lot of banana ice cream filled recipe coming and I figured its a good idea to have the basic banana ice cream recipe ready for people to refer too.%u00a0 And because I made so much fantastic naner ice cream, I also made a cookies and cream naner ice cream for my sisters and the mister.
%u00a0 %u00a0
The stuff you need for this ice cream%u2026. Nice and ripe bananas, peeled and then frozen* That’s it.
After all blended and smooth, either eat right away or scoop ice cream into a freezer safe container and stick in freezer. That’s the banana ice cream%u2026 %u00a0And it is amazing and so so so so so addictive. I make a batch, think I am only going to eat a scoop, then find myself eating half of what I have made, but it’s ok cause it’s only bananas.%u00a0
One%u00a0batch of banana ice cream, either freshly made, still in food processor or made ahead and placed in a food processor and given a good pulse to smooth it up.
Now you have cookies and cream naner ice cream%u2026. and everybody is happy.
I don’t know if I have bitched enough about it, but I only have one window in my living space. And as much as I love love love our little tiny loft, I am a person who needs the sun. So when I am home I spend a lot of time siting in front of the window.%u00a0 Over the past few weeks I have been doing a lot of watercolor painting in front of that window and somehow %u00a0between drawings of carrots and %u00a0vintage fans, I ended up making these marbled window stained glass hoops. And I am glade I did because these little watercolor gems really do make a big impact on my one source of sunlight. Even when the day is kind of gray and gloomy, having these in the window make the light seem brighter and happy.%u00a0
So this project is really easy and fast. I recommend that if you are going to go to the trouble (it’s really no trouble) of making one, you might as well make 2 or 5. I actually made a bunch (think Mothers day or Easter presents) and ended up only keeping a s couple. I am going to have to make a few more soon.
Take a piece(s) of paper a little bit bigger then the hoop you are working with and stick it into a pan or tray of water. Let it sit there for a few minutes until the paper is completely soaked.
Take the wet paper and, oh so gently, crumple into a ball. This part can be a little tricky. You want to make as many creases as possible without ripping that paper. (I ripped a few pieces) I found that if I folded that paper a few time, then crumpled that it was less likely to rip.
Uncrumple the paper and lay it gently onto the inner part of the hoop. Now the fun part. Go to town with the watercolors. I used 2 colors per piece, but you could do 1 or 3, or more. When applying the color, use big gentle strokes and let the colors kind of meld together. Watch as all the crumple veins soak up the paint. Try using different dilutions of color. I applied some color on thinly and some on the thicker side. But really, you can’t go wrong, just keep applying paint until you are happy. I stopped a few times and held it up to%u00a0the window just to see what it looked like. When it looked good, I was done.
When you are happy with the colors, let the paper dry for a while on the hoop %u00a0until it is not longer super wet. I would say about an hour or so, but if you stick it near the heater, it might dry faster. (Just don’t stick it in the oven while you are making bread like I did with one.. It just ended up setting on fire. Oops)
The kitchen, living room, dinning room, office…all over great room., covered in piles of clothes. Sometimes listening to music and folding laundry can be so, I don’t know, peaceful. I just felt happy at this moment. (might be the fact that I know have some clean clothes and dish cloths)
Standing in line at the grocery store, saw this magazine and started to laugh. I love Oprah…but now…I really love Oprah. Best magazine cover ever!
Another picture of the pup. Letting his rino toy have the bed. A little pathetic…A lot cute
I am doing little recipe testing and this situation in this pot is so freaking good! Just trying to work out a few technical kinks. 


I have been meaning do a post on seltzer and syrups for a while now and this one is perfect… Everyone around me has been getting sick and I am trying my hardest to not get anything. 


So lovely…. so nice. I really got into these flavors. This drink has the ability to make you feel warm and cozy while being cold and fresh. It makes me happy.


Before we get to the fries, I just want to mention that yesterday was one of those fantastic winter days that reminds me why I love living in Vermont. Pretty white snow everywhere, the sun was out, and 20 degrees without a gust of wind. The trash dog an I were even able to go for a little hike. It was so nice and soooo sooo needed! Anyways, the other day as me, my sister and the mister where putting together one more piece of Ikea furniture, (I am the master at Ikea assembling!) a little runs into the room and presents the mister with a Dominos pizza. Yup, a whole pizza just for him. Why you might ask? Well I guess my sister was delivered the wrong pizza and the place didn’t want it back and she didn’t want it, so she gave it to him.
The carrots and the parsnips are all sliced up into big matchsticks and ready to be baked to crispy browned perfection. I added the oil to the pan to toss the fries in and then sprinkled with a fair amount of salt and pepper. If you don’t have and or want to use a cast iron pan, a baking sheet works just the same.
Oh saucy sauce stuff. Tomato puree, sriracha, and yellow mustard. Add a little bit of honey to lighten it up (can use brown sugar if keeping it vegan), a splash of apple cider vinegar and a couple minced cloves of garlic. Topped off with the smokey delightful spice of cumin. I cold eat this on everything…and I kind of did.
Fries are done, Sauce is ready. Served in super cute tea cups.(from now on I want to serve everything in tea cups.) A perfect side dish, snack, or even a light meal. It lead the mister to ask the question…What pizza?
Happy Hanukkah!!! Today is the first day of the festival of lights and I wanted to send a little love towards those who celebrate it.
I didn’t actually use all the potatoes in the picture, but I wish I did. There was the perfect amount for dinner for two people, but I wanted to make a few extra for left overs….there were none. Oh well.
I did a matchstick dice for the apples.. I didn’t want the apples to be to chunky and I didn’t want them to turn into sauce so the match stick worked well. After I diced the apples, I squeezed a little lemon over the top to keep the apple from turning brown.
I start grating the potatoes and onion, and whoa! Imagine my surprise when one of the potatoes was purple… I got pretty excited.The color is so beautiful. and made the latkes look so nice…It was meant to be.
Super squeeze the juices out of the grated potato and onion. If you don’t get most of the liquid out, the potato won’t crisp up and will fall apart and be and it will be gross. So SQUEEZE!
Add in the egg, cornstarch, salt and pepper and mix it on up. Did I mention that I was making these for the mister and the GF sister..No flour, just cornstarch. I think they might have come out even better without the flour…so yeah, these babies are gluten-free.
Your mixture is going to start to get a little watery again. Its cool, just squeeze it out with your hands and smash into patties.
Enough oil to cover the bottom of the pan on medium heat. Test the oil to make sure its hot enough before sticking the latke n the pan. To test, sprinkle water in pan, if it sizzles, its ready.Working in batches, fry each latke on each side for around 5 minutes..you don’t want to cook to fast or the inside of the latkes will be raw. I always do a tester and feed it to nick. He’s my guinea pig….He said they were awesome..
With every batch made, stick on a wire rack and keep in the oven to stay warm. The rack keeps the bottom from getting soggy on the pan… so use it.
Roasted apples are the BOMB!!! Its like eating apple sauce sticks or little bites of heaven(A bit dramatic, but these are so good) I roasted mine for 20 minutes, until they were nice and soft but not completely failing apart. If you are into it, add a touch of cinnamon…I did’t this time, but you bet I am going to be making myself a big ol bowl of roasted apples this week, and yes, I will top with cinnamon.
A bowl of apple slaw, sour cream and lemon wedges….I put the latkes on a nice little pile of greens. A very good idea. A dinner worth celebrating!
I also served the latkes with roasted chickpeas and cailflower…for more of a meal…( Mini recipe… Cauilfower and chick peas drizzled in olive oil, tossed in salt pepper and garlic, roasted 30 minutes and topped with lemon) A little added veggie and protein….I am looking out for you people.
There we have it…my variation on a traditional food. Enjoy your fried pancakes of potato and onion, they are a food worth a celebration.
Sometimes, no matter whats going on with the week, Monday seems like, well, like a Monday. I drag a little on Mondays. I think it stems from the Monday through Friday school week that was beaten into me for 16 plus years. Hate Mondays, Love Fridays.. Yup, I blame the public educational system(I have to blame someone) I want my day back. I don’t want to feel the drag today. I am going to have a fantastic day. I’m getting excited, pumped up and ready for the week. I am turning my Mondays into fun days. Funday Monday…Yes, yes I did just say that. . See, don’t we all feel better already?
One large rutabaga… This one fed 2 as a side… but if your eating just the fries, eat a whole one to your face. It’s totally cool.
Chop the rutabaga into fries and toss with a smidge of oil, salt, pepper and ground up rosemary. Don’t like the rosemary… don’t use it. Maybe try something else like sage or garlic and onion powder or curry powder. Just use whatever you like. Throw into a 425 degree oven for 20 minutes, give them a flip and back in for another 15, Simple. Easy.
THE LOVELY CRAZY
November 12, 2019 by maximios • Blog
Comments that I got from my sisters and the mister when I made them this ice cream
-Sister one.”I give this my sister seal of approval.. It’s so good. The first dessert you have made that I liked! (not including all the other desserts that you have made that I liked)”
-Sister two- “Wow.. it looks like ice cream and feels like ice cream and tastes like ice cream.. You should make me this ice cream!” (I was confused too because I was pretty sure I just made her some)
-The mister- “I am so excited for my new fly fishing pole!”
Ok, so the naner ice cream isn’t new to the mister and he IS very much excited for his new fly fish pole. So excited that he forgot to tell me how amazing that I am and to thank me for making him a big bowl of yumminess. (It’s ok, I forgive him)
And yes, this is probably one of the easiest, most delicious, healthy and amazing frozen dessert that you will ever eat. You will probably find yourself buying mass amounts of bananas and stocking the freezer until things just start falling out. (which is also ok because it’s only bananas and you can’t have too many frozen bananas)
To make it, place frozen bananas into food processor and hit the on button. Process the crap out of the namers until nice and silky smooth.
*Note, the smaller the frozen chunks are , the faster and maybe a little easier for the blender to blend the naners into ice cream. So if you think of it, chop bananas into pieces before freezing or even after.
Now for the cookies and cream banana ice cream..
One batch of banana ice cream, either freshly made, still in food processor or made ahead and placed in a food processor and given a good pulse to smooth it up.
Add cookies in, crushing a bit beforehand and pulse till combined.
Now you have cookies and cream naner ice cream…. and everybody is happy.
Scoop into a cup, a bowl, a freezer safe container, or directly into your mouth. Be careful…. You can still get brain freeze from eating naner ice cream too fast!
Keep it real hump day drum bum!
-C
Basic Banana Ice Cream
Makes one batch. Good for 3-4 servings
Peel bananas and stick in a freezer bag or container and freeze. When bananas are completely frozen, break into pieces and stick into a food processor or blender and puree until silky smooth.
Eat right away or scoop into a freezer safe container for later.
Cookies and Cream Banana Ice Cream
In a food processor, blend banana ice cream with cookies.
Eat right away, with a utensil of choice in a container of choice.
Bowl licking is acceptable.